Why is therapy a slow process?

K. and I are reviewing treatment goals. 

“Of course,” She says, “There’s the ongoing goals of monitoring triggers, safety, improving internal communication…” She pauses while thinking.  “And we haven’t even gotten to grieving loss yet.”

I was trying to listen, but I lost the tail-end of her sentence.  “We haven’t gotten to what yet?”

“Grieving loss.  Loss of control of the body, loss of self-identity, loss of safety…”

I started to get floaty and check out.

K. nodded, “Aaaand, now I’m triggering you.  I think we’ll stop there.”

I can’t even talk about treatment goals without dissociating. :/

3 thoughts on “Why is therapy a slow process?”

  1. Grief is a HUGE part of recovery. And, in some ways, perhaps the most important part. Because there is no way to move forward without grieving the losses.

    I think dissociative barriers exist partially as a way to protect against feeling the overwhelming loss that happens – especially as a result of organized child sexual abuse.

    Grief is like a spiral that you circle around again and again and again. All of my parts have felt or needed to express profound grief on very different issues. Some days, it’s immobilizing. But it gets easier with time and as we, as a team, learn to build a new life moving forward, in the now.

    There is a fabulous 3 part study by Sandra Bloom entitled: “The Grief that Dare Not Speak Its Name: Dealing with The Ravages of Childhood Sexual Abuse” in The Psychotherapy Review that is so informative. Worth the read. I keep it on my desktop on my computer so I have easy access to it. It has helped me find the words and/or understand some of what insiders are feeling and trying to express.

    Take care-

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